A mockingbird has decided the little tree right off our front porch is the perfect place for her nest. She worked for weeks preparing this intricate nest, sitting on her eggs and getting ready for her young ones. Now the eggs have hatched and she busies herself all day bringing food to them and caring for them.
As I looked out early this morning she was sitting in the nest with them and all was quiet. The minute Momma Bird flies off, the crying begins. Her little ones call and call for her until she returns. With every return, she brings them food and works to provide for them all day long. She diligently protects these helpless ones from predators.
As an expectant mom, I worked, prepared, and waited for my little ones to arrive. When they first came home seemingly all of my time was spent feeding, nurturing and caring for them. As they grew older, my time was spent molding their character, teaching them love, kindness, sharing, teaching them about Jesus. Now my role as a mom has changed yet again. Now I'm loving, guiding and nurturing from a bit of a distance. They're becoming more independent and needing my presence less and less. They still need me for sure, but my constant presence isn't necessary.
Just like the Momma Bird, this Momma has moved to more of a protection role. My job is to help my children make decisions about their future, about their friends, about their education, etc. that will serve them well later in life. My job is to protect them and help them make godly decisions on their own.
I must tell you this is the most difficult phase for me. When they were younger, mothering was more demanding. This is just plain difficult. It's difficult to watch them make choices I would rather they not have to make yet. It's difficult to see them make bad decisions, even though they seem so trivial at this point in their lives. Trying to raise godly, passionate, strong, loving children isn't easy especially when I'm less than godly, passionate, strong, and loving due to the exhaustion from CIDP.
Thankfully the Lord "gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak." Isaiah 40:29. In times like these, I'm holding fast to the remainder of Isaiah 40 which says, "Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall: but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."
"Lord, thank you for blessing me with three beautiful children. Help me to raise them as I know they are not mine, but yours. Amen."
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Do You Remember?
Do you remember the day you first felt Jesus in your life? Did your heart race?
Do you remember the feeling when you first knew He was real?
Do you remember the day you finally said, "Okay, my life is yours?" Were there tears of joy?
Do you remember the day you said you wanted to belong to Him always? Did you feel as if heaven was close enough to reach out and touch it?
Do you remember the day you shared with others your decision to follow Jesus?
Do you remember the exact moment you were washed in the waters of baptism? Did you feel His love wash over you? Remember?
I remember as if it was yesterday. It was a day I'll never forget. It was actually after midnight during the summer. My husband and I were both baptized in a friend's swimming pool here in Corpus. The beginning of a new life, a new walk together with Jesus. Even in the middle of the night, friends and family shared in the event and it was amazing. I had watched these friends live out their faith in front of me for awhile. Jesus became real to me through them. (BTW, Who's watching you?)
My excitement and privilege to be a child of God is the same today as it was that day in the swimming pool. My passion for Him has grown and will burn within me until the day He comes again. My challenge for you today is to live out your passion for Christ daily. Let your faith in Christ be vibrant, outrageous, alive...live out loud!
Share your "moment" with me! What do you remember about the day you became His? I'd love to hear your story!
Blessings,
Kristen
Do you remember the feeling when you first knew He was real?
Do you remember the day you finally said, "Okay, my life is yours?" Were there tears of joy?
Do you remember the day you said you wanted to belong to Him always? Did you feel as if heaven was close enough to reach out and touch it?
Do you remember the day you shared with others your decision to follow Jesus?
Do you remember the exact moment you were washed in the waters of baptism? Did you feel His love wash over you? Remember?
I remember as if it was yesterday. It was a day I'll never forget. It was actually after midnight during the summer. My husband and I were both baptized in a friend's swimming pool here in Corpus. The beginning of a new life, a new walk together with Jesus. Even in the middle of the night, friends and family shared in the event and it was amazing. I had watched these friends live out their faith in front of me for awhile. Jesus became real to me through them. (BTW, Who's watching you?)
My excitement and privilege to be a child of God is the same today as it was that day in the swimming pool. My passion for Him has grown and will burn within me until the day He comes again. My challenge for you today is to live out your passion for Christ daily. Let your faith in Christ be vibrant, outrageous, alive...live out loud!
Share your "moment" with me! What do you remember about the day you became His? I'd love to hear your story!
Blessings,
Kristen
Saturday, June 7, 2008
When You Look At Me
Please continue to leave your comments on keeping your marriage strong with chronic illness!
Today's post is meant to be honest and authentic, but in NO way is it a pity party. I wouldn't trade my life for anything. This is just something I wrote in my journal awhile back. Let me know what you think.
When You Look At Me
* You see my smile...What you don't see is a choice. I don't always feel like smiling but I'm choosing to live a life of joy despite this illness.
* You see a woman who is dressed and wearing makeup...What you don't see are the days when this just isn't possible for me because on those days, I hide from you.
* You see that my hair is "done"... What you don't see is that even on a good day, raising my arms over my head to dry my hair is nearly impossible.
* You see my expanding waistline...What you don't see is my search for healthy food I can actually eat without annoying migraines and nausea.
* You see a body without muscle tone...What you don't see is that if I exercise, I'll be unable to get through the day with my kids.
* You see someone who moves slowly and cautiously, perhaps even lazily...What you don't see is my lack of balance and my struggle to even pick up my feet when I walk.
* You see a woman who likes to wear flip flops...What you don't see is the pain and discomfort of wearing shoes on most days.
* You see someone too lazy to cook for her house guests...What you don't see is I'd rather spend time visiting with you than using all my strength just preparing you a meal. I love having you in my home and spending time with you.
* You see chubby fingers...What you don't see is painful joint inflammation.
* You see a round, puffy face with awkward features...What you don't see are the steroids that saved my life at one point or the fear of having to return to steroids one day.
* You see a casually dressed woman...What you don't see is my constant search for inexpensive clothes without buttons or snaps that are hard to grip or my search for natural fibers that don't burn my skin.
* You see my trembling hands and think I'm nervous...What you don't see is the demyelination occurring in my body that has nothing to do with being nervous.
* You see my busy lifestyle...What you don't see are the days I have to stay home in bed.
*You see a strong, self-confident woman...What you don't see is a weak woman made strong only through the power of Jesus Christ who is full of hope!
What do we see when we look at you? What do we not see?
Blessings, Kristen
Today's post is meant to be honest and authentic, but in NO way is it a pity party. I wouldn't trade my life for anything. This is just something I wrote in my journal awhile back. Let me know what you think.
When You Look At Me
* You see my smile...What you don't see is a choice. I don't always feel like smiling but I'm choosing to live a life of joy despite this illness.
* You see a woman who is dressed and wearing makeup...What you don't see are the days when this just isn't possible for me because on those days, I hide from you.
* You see that my hair is "done"... What you don't see is that even on a good day, raising my arms over my head to dry my hair is nearly impossible.
* You see my expanding waistline...What you don't see is my search for healthy food I can actually eat without annoying migraines and nausea.
* You see a body without muscle tone...What you don't see is that if I exercise, I'll be unable to get through the day with my kids.
* You see someone who moves slowly and cautiously, perhaps even lazily...What you don't see is my lack of balance and my struggle to even pick up my feet when I walk.
* You see a woman who likes to wear flip flops...What you don't see is the pain and discomfort of wearing shoes on most days.
* You see someone too lazy to cook for her house guests...What you don't see is I'd rather spend time visiting with you than using all my strength just preparing you a meal. I love having you in my home and spending time with you.
* You see chubby fingers...What you don't see is painful joint inflammation.
* You see a round, puffy face with awkward features...What you don't see are the steroids that saved my life at one point or the fear of having to return to steroids one day.
* You see a casually dressed woman...What you don't see is my constant search for inexpensive clothes without buttons or snaps that are hard to grip or my search for natural fibers that don't burn my skin.
* You see my trembling hands and think I'm nervous...What you don't see is the demyelination occurring in my body that has nothing to do with being nervous.
* You see my busy lifestyle...What you don't see are the days I have to stay home in bed.
*You see a strong, self-confident woman...What you don't see is a weak woman made strong only through the power of Jesus Christ who is full of hope!
What do we see when we look at you? What do we not see?
Blessings, Kristen
Monday, May 26, 2008
Staggering Statistic
75% of marriages in which at least one spouse is afflicted with chronic illness ends in divorce.
This statistic just rocks my little world! If you or your spouse live with an illness it's easy to see why the divorce rate is incredibly high. Chronic illness places additional struggles on any marriage, no matter how strong your faith.
On the other hand, what makes the other 25% stay together? What makes their marriage stronger? I'm so blessed to be married to a wonderful man who loves God, loves me, and loves our children. But I would be willing to bet a portion of the 75% marriages who ended in divorce said the same thing at one point. When chronic illness shows up it changes everything, but there are marriages out there who are made stronger by illness.
Here's where we can learn from each other, what keeps your marriage together? What keeps your marriage strong? Even with chronic illness as part of your marriage, what keeps you two strong?
I will share my thoughts later, but for now I would love to hear from you. Email me your thoughts or post a comment to this post. If you've never posted a comment, just click on "Comment" and you can leave your name or comment anonymously if you'd like. Share your thoughts on keeping a strong marriage in the midst of chronic illness. Thanks for sharing!
Blessings for a strong marriage,
Kristen
This statistic just rocks my little world! If you or your spouse live with an illness it's easy to see why the divorce rate is incredibly high. Chronic illness places additional struggles on any marriage, no matter how strong your faith.
On the other hand, what makes the other 25% stay together? What makes their marriage stronger? I'm so blessed to be married to a wonderful man who loves God, loves me, and loves our children. But I would be willing to bet a portion of the 75% marriages who ended in divorce said the same thing at one point. When chronic illness shows up it changes everything, but there are marriages out there who are made stronger by illness.
Here's where we can learn from each other, what keeps your marriage together? What keeps your marriage strong? Even with chronic illness as part of your marriage, what keeps you two strong?
I will share my thoughts later, but for now I would love to hear from you. Email me your thoughts or post a comment to this post. If you've never posted a comment, just click on "Comment" and you can leave your name or comment anonymously if you'd like. Share your thoughts on keeping a strong marriage in the midst of chronic illness. Thanks for sharing!
Blessings for a strong marriage,
Kristen
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
IVIG day and ALS
Today was treatment day! Glad to get it over with, but I'm not looking forward to the next few days. My hands and feet are swollen and my head is pounding. Thankfully, I've only gotten sick once today! I can't complain and once again I'm thankful for IVIG.
Please pray for my friend who was recently diagnosed with ALS. He is a godly man with a beautiful family and my heart breaks for them. Thanks for your prayers on his behalf.
Be encouraged today. Even in the midst of illness and heartbreak, God is there. Hope is found.
Blessings,
Kristen
Please pray for my friend who was recently diagnosed with ALS. He is a godly man with a beautiful family and my heart breaks for them. Thanks for your prayers on his behalf.
Be encouraged today. Even in the midst of illness and heartbreak, God is there. Hope is found.
Blessings,
Kristen
Saturday, May 17, 2008
"How Are You?" continued
I'm sharing a short thought written by my new friend, Doris Farley. You can read her bio at the end to find out more about this gifted writer! Her words continue with our "How are you?" thought and she says it so beautifully. Share your thoughts!
Blessings for you today,
Kristen
"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." (Colossians 4:6) (NIV).
"How are you?" is a question I often dread. Some people truly want to know, and can relate to what we're feeling. But there are so many well intentioned "others"- those who care, but may not really want to or need to hear our painful answer. I'm finally beginning to ask myself, "Do they really want to know?" before I respond. What will happen, I wonder, if I respond, "I'm
having quite a painful day and I'm terribly emotional?" Will I receive well-meaning advice? Will they stumble over their sympathies, or will there be that long, pregnant pause, because they just won't know what to say?
Colossians 4:6 tells us that our speech should always be "full of grace." Another Bible version I use reads "pleasant, gracious and winsome."
I wonder what can I possibly say that is pleasant when I'm truly feeling rotten? What words can I offer that are seasoned like salt, flavorful enough that one would want to feast on them, or relish them like a favorite dessert? Our words have an impact on others, so perhaps we need to think of our response as an opportunity. Can we, despite how we're feeling, bless, encourage, love, and make them feel warm inside? Perhaps, we can express thanks and indicate how much their caring means. Or perhaps we can share our love for Jesus and the strength He gives us as He helps us persevere each day. Yes, our physical feelings would then remain unsaid, or be said less frequently. But thankfully we know that we can bear all to our Lord and Savior and He will listen, and truly understand, care and comfort us, better than any other human ever could!
Beloved, we have an opportunity at hand! Boy, I know I've got some changes to make in this area! With the Holy Spirit's guidance, we can serve the best tasting words to others.
Prayer: "Dear Lord, when we're feeling burdened by pain and illness, we know You understand. Help us then to know how to speak to others, to build them up and share Your love, despite how we're feeling."
_________________________________________________________
Blessings for you today,
Kristen
"Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." (Colossians 4:6) (NIV).
"How are you?" is a question I often dread. Some people truly want to know, and can relate to what we're feeling. But there are so many well intentioned "others"- those who care, but may not really want to or need to hear our painful answer. I'm finally beginning to ask myself, "Do they really want to know?" before I respond. What will happen, I wonder, if I respond, "I'm
having quite a painful day and I'm terribly emotional?" Will I receive well-meaning advice? Will they stumble over their sympathies, or will there be that long, pregnant pause, because they just won't know what to say?
Colossians 4:6 tells us that our speech should always be "full of grace." Another Bible version I use reads "pleasant, gracious and winsome."
I wonder what can I possibly say that is pleasant when I'm truly feeling rotten? What words can I offer that are seasoned like salt, flavorful enough that one would want to feast on them, or relish them like a favorite dessert? Our words have an impact on others, so perhaps we need to think of our response as an opportunity. Can we, despite how we're feeling, bless, encourage, love, and make them feel warm inside? Perhaps, we can express thanks and indicate how much their caring means. Or perhaps we can share our love for Jesus and the strength He gives us as He helps us persevere each day. Yes, our physical feelings would then remain unsaid, or be said less frequently. But thankfully we know that we can bear all to our Lord and Savior and He will listen, and truly understand, care and comfort us, better than any other human ever could!
Beloved, we have an opportunity at hand! Boy, I know I've got some changes to make in this area! With the Holy Spirit's guidance, we can serve the best tasting words to others.
Prayer: "Dear Lord, when we're feeling burdened by pain and illness, we know You understand. Help us then to know how to speak to others, to build them up and share Your love, despite how we're feeling."
_________________________________________________________
Doris Farley experiences chronic pain that began after an accident. Her circumstances have led to an unexpected, life-changing spiritual journey that has renewed her commitment to our Lord. She thanks God for reaching her and prays that He will reach you also, through the words He gives her to write for you. You may write to her at dorisfarley@aol.com
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Tagged by Storm
I've been tagged by Storm and I'm not feeling too confident about my answers, but here goes!
Questions:
1. What were you doing 10 years ago?
Wow! Ten years ago, my son DiMarco was five months old and I was physically struggling to care for him. It was a joyous moment in my life because I just had a sweet, healthy baby boy. But it was one of the darkest times in my life health wise.
2. What are 5 things on your "To Do" list?
Pay bills.
Study the book of Job.
Field trip on Thursday.
Finish this meme.
Find a quality videographer.
3. What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
Oh, good grief!
Marble Slab Cheesecake Ice Cream
Strawberry Squeezer from Keva Juice
Heath bar (especially as a mix in with cheesecake ice cream!)
Nutter Butters
Chips and Queso
4. Name some things you would do if you were a millionaire.
Buy a house and car for my mom and cover her needs, pay off our house and truck (and bills), buy a house with a big backyard for my kids, pay for college for all 3 kids, my husband would be able to start his own business, pay for retirement, save, invest, vacation with my husband and kids, and care for family.
5. Name some places where you have lived.
Michigan, California, Minnesota, Texas.
6. Name some bad habits you have.
To name a few...being critical of others, yelling, overeating, procrastinating, and on and on...
7. Name some jobs you have had.
Let's see...ice cream scooper, cake decorator, professor's assistant, secretary, teacher, preschool director, caseworker for attorney, director of ministry development, volunteer coordinator, outreach minister and I'm sure I missed a few.
8. Name those whom you are tagging.
I'm not sure yet.
Questions:
1. What were you doing 10 years ago?
Wow! Ten years ago, my son DiMarco was five months old and I was physically struggling to care for him. It was a joyous moment in my life because I just had a sweet, healthy baby boy. But it was one of the darkest times in my life health wise.
2. What are 5 things on your "To Do" list?
Pay bills.
Study the book of Job.
Field trip on Thursday.
Finish this meme.
Find a quality videographer.
3. What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
Oh, good grief!
Marble Slab Cheesecake Ice Cream
Strawberry Squeezer from Keva Juice
Heath bar (especially as a mix in with cheesecake ice cream!)
Nutter Butters
Chips and Queso
4. Name some things you would do if you were a millionaire.
Buy a house and car for my mom and cover her needs, pay off our house and truck (and bills), buy a house with a big backyard for my kids, pay for college for all 3 kids, my husband would be able to start his own business, pay for retirement, save, invest, vacation with my husband and kids, and care for family.
5. Name some places where you have lived.
Michigan, California, Minnesota, Texas.
6. Name some bad habits you have.
To name a few...being critical of others, yelling, overeating, procrastinating, and on and on...
7. Name some jobs you have had.
Let's see...ice cream scooper, cake decorator, professor's assistant, secretary, teacher, preschool director, caseworker for attorney, director of ministry development, volunteer coordinator, outreach minister and I'm sure I missed a few.
8. Name those whom you are tagging.
I'm not sure yet.
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